[Previous entry: "Christmas is near! :D"] Main Index [Next entry: "hosting xD"]

12/25/2002 Archived Entry: "merry christmas!"

Song: Charmed theme, The Smiths
Ok, I've wanted to say this for a few days but somehow I keep forgetting. But there are some real bitches in the world. It's not that I don't realize it, but every time they manage to do something, either to people close to me or to myself, I feel disgusted all over again. In this instance, I am referring to the bitches who have hurt Nahi-chan. I will not be naming any names, and they'll probably never read this entry, but you know who you are. Is it so hard to act mature for once in life? Nahi-chan is the best advice giver I know, and she has done nothing but help others. I feel that it's a huge, *huge* pity that some people would go and abuse her advice-giving talents. I feel disgusted...this has got to be one of my biggest pet peeves, is when someone abuses something so pure and delicate and completely sincere. If you don't like an advice, then don't listen to it. It's your life. But don't turn around and bitch at them back. If you end up tasting the consequences, so be it...some people need to taste the medicine that they dish out. I've been encouraging and listening to Nahi-chan over AIM for 3 or 4 days now, and I've just gotten her not to disappear from the net and think about the future of her online life for a bit more. So Tuesday morning I was at my dad's office (with T1 connection ^.~) and I visited her blog to find another rant. I wanted to comment but since my dad was 2 inches from me, I figured I should stay low profile. But I *did* read the one comment someone left in response. Someone named "Katie." (I vaguely remember her homepage but I was going to respond to her comment) I don't remember exactly what she said, I was so pissed at the time. She said something about "don't take your online life/friends so seriously" and "you're probably never going to meet them" etc etc. Which completely disgusts me. Maybe I won't meet Nahi-chan, but just because one is a few states away or even across the world does not mean that they're any less sincere. Yes, there's only so much you can do with emocons/smily faces, but it's people behind the computer screen, and they're not all stalkers, mind you. They can meet if they want to, and they can become good friends, better than they were already. What she said was ridiculous, and I was too mad at the time and didn't think Nahi-chan would close down her sites so soon. (like the afternoon of Tuesday) I really need that girl's homepage so I can knock some serious sense into her. And you know what, it was so freakin' close to Christmas too...what are people thinking?? Blah. I'm finished with my rant. ><

On to happier things...thank you Rhian, Europa, Tasuki, Starlette and a number of other people for the wonderful gifts. :D They're all gorgeous! I hope everyone had a great Christmas or whatever holiday you celebrate. :3 If you don't celebrate any holidays, at least there's the nice winter break. <3

Finally, this layout...I like it a lot :) It was an experiment in PS a while ago and I happened to save it. I was going through my folders today and came across it so I touched up on it a bit. I think I'm going to make a portfolio for these things so I don't lose them. :D

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Replies: x7

Happy holidays to you too Trin-chu! XD

Posted by Marurori @ 12/27/2002 05:43 AM CST

Hope you had a nice holiday, Trin! WOOO, bluee layout. Totally agree with you on the rant about those idiots who harassed Nahi.

Posted by Valerie @ 12/26/2002 07:33 PM CST

Pretty new layout, trin-chan! *_*

I agree with you. Nahi-chan, or anyone at all, SHOULD NOT have to deal with people like that. It really makes me sick. There are actual people behind the computer screens and I think people forget that sometimes. Or maybe they're just taking advantage of the fact that we can't reach over and smack the heck out of them. o_o;

Posted by Europa @ 12/26/2002 07:12 PM CST

*coughs* Scratch all that...and if you don't understand go read my blog and Spellbound!! I'm losing it!! Do not try to understand me this week!!

Posted by Nahi-chan @ 12/26/2002 11:23 AM CST

MERRY CHRISTMAS, TRIN-CHAN!

Posted by Maddie @ 12/25/2002 08:24 PM CST

Sigh, it is sad when innocent people feel forced to leave the internet because a couple of wicked and immature people decide to be a pain and destroy a person's dedication and hobby like that. They should be ashamed of themselves!!! Poor Nahi-chan, although I don't know her, I sympathise with her predicament. Maybe one day she would feel up to it to return and triumph over these losers.

BTW, lovely new layout Trin! ^__^

Posted by Belinda @ 12/25/2002 07:35 PM CST

*sighs* Trin-chan I am going to have to explain this to everyone somehow and I only hope people will understand and not take this the wrong way when I say it. What happened to me online I believe happened for a reason. I've been told that God has his own plan for our lives. Perhaps in mine this was my time to move forward.

You know I've had a lot of computer problems recently. Honestly speaking they've been there for a year some minor and some major. On top of it I had a hell of a time this past year keeping stable jobs. I've had car problems also. Then came the family problems that since my freshman year never really left. You add on top of that the fact that people online had starting to treat me cruddy. This does not include you or anyone at ER or Spellbound. That group of people is the greatest group of people online I ever met. You all stood by me at all times. You meant the world to me then and you will always mean the world to me because in all the darkness of the past year you were all my light. You were what kept me going because frankly I almost gave up long before I got the domain.

When a hobby is no longer a hobby, but an obligation you feel you have to fulfill for others and those others rarely comment with any good praise on all the hours and sweat you pour into something you find that you have to let it go. You can't beat a dead horse back to life. For me this has been dead for at least half a year. I was so in denial because I felt to let you, those at ER, and those at Spellbound down by closing my sites would kill me.

Then I read Maki's blog about how she was leaving because she wanted her offline life back and stuff. I thought about my whole situation and realized that I no longer even enjoyed making my sites. It was a job to me and nothing more. The excitment was gone. With so much negativity that I felt on the net from thieves and flamers not just attacking me but friends I was just so worn out. I couldn't go forward. Yet I was too scared to speak out until now and say I can't do this. I didn't want to fail everyone. I hate failures especially mine. So I kept living in denial and not facing the fact that I was ready to take back my offline life. I didn't know how to say to everyone that despite how important you all are to me I must move on with my life. Not that I will not still want to stay in contact with you, but that I too must find my true place in life...in the real world... That what is best for me now as an adult is to go out there in the world and stop hiding behind an online persona and actually make a real difference.

I'll never forget my online experiences or my friends because I did meet great people and learn fantastic lessons, but things have to change. Life has to move forward and for me to move forward I have to go. I hope no one thinks that I mean to say this wasn't important enough to me because it was and to a degree still is, but even still no one can let the internet consume their whole life and that is what I did.

If you'd like to for me pass this message on to ER and Spellbound in case I don't get to it fast enough. I hope, sincerely hope, that no one thinks that I value them or their frienship any less than before by saying that I have to move on with my life. That was my greatest fear in letting go of my sites and obligations to ER. That was why I lived in denial for so long. This is what happens when you think long and hard and find yourself forced to make a huge decision in your life. It means sometimes you have to let go of great things to move on to even greater things. Believe me I hurt deeply inside having let go of all my hard work, but I know eventually I will realize that this was a great decision I made for myself.

Posted by Nahi-chan @ 12/25/2002 02:52 PM CST